Category Archives: holidaze

christmas 2016.

Happiest holidays, loves!  I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas.  Ours was so so lovely… we opted to spend the holidays here instead of flying to Minnesota, because newborn.  We definitely missed spending time with all the fams but there was also something very sweet about having time with just our little family.  It was just… cozy.  The whole holiday weekend felt like a giant hug.  The fact that I was in pj’s 85% of the time + WINE probably contributed to that feeling as well.

We spent most of the weekend hanging out at home, watching Christmas movie after Christmas movie, playing games, cuddling up on the couch, and eating all the things.  Lobster mac and cheese is always our Christmas Eve dinner of choice and this year did not disappoint.  And hey, if I could gift you one thing this year, it would be the wisdom of this mac and cheese recipe.  Merry Christmas, from me to you!  (I should probably also throw in a pair of stretch pants, because you’re gonna look 5 months pregnant after you eat it. I speak from experience.)

Crosby was such a sweetpea with Christmas this year.   He sorta/kinda knows what’s up and got pretty into the festivities.  Though I think his basic knowledge of the entire holiday season can be summed up with the word “presents”.   The kid has gotten so many gifts, he thinks it’s just common practice now.   His favorite thing to say lately is, “mama! I have an idea! ….. presents!”  So sweet.  So hysterical.  So terrifying.

And our sweet Willa was a trooper through it all.  She’s such a wonderful little baby lady.  My heart bursts just thinking about her.  (So do my boobs. Heyo!)  I cannot wait until she is able to partake in all the holiday festivities, but in the meantime I am loving her chill-ness (chill-ability?).

Anyhoo, we had a great holiday weekend and  I’m so bummed that it’s over.  We already took our tree down this morning.  We typically keep our tree up until after New Years but this year it had to go early because it was deader than crap.  But, she was a good tree.  She brought us lots of warm fuzzies this season.  And now she’s just sitting on the curb…. withering away alongside my bank account and soul.

Well that got dark.

And on that cheery note!  Here is a little video I made of our Christmas weekend.  Take a peek, if you’d like!

Happy Christmas, sweet friends.


it’s fall, so, pumpkins!

It wouldn’t be fall unless you were inundated with a ridiculous amount of pumpkin photos.  So this post is me, doing my part to help the cause.  You’re welcome!

I have been feeling like such a sloth lately but this past weekend I forced myself and my boys to get up and out of the house and go to a pumpkin patch.  I’m in the chapter of this pregnancy when we don’t really know how many more free weekends we have before little sis arrives, so I wanted to make sure we got our pumpkin patch on before it’s too late and my boobs are perma stuck in someone’s face and I can’t leave the house for eleven years.

I’ve decided that even though I’m 187 weeks pregnant, I’m going to embrace the fall season with arms wide open.  Whatever that means.  So far I’ve decorated our house in Halloween decorations and made pumpkin muffins and bought pumpkin spice syrup to dress up my morning coffee.  There are a couple of baking pumpkins on the counter just waiting to be turned into soup, and a vanilla pumpkin candle burning right in front of me as we speak.  And now we can cross pumpkin patch off the list as well.  Crushing it.

In other news, we have yet to install the baby’s car seat or pack a hospital bag.  So at least I have my priorities straight.

Anyways, here are some photos from our little pumpkin outing, if you care to see!

I mean. This photo is what us basic moms live for. Am I right?

Crosby is all talk when it comes to horses.  Here he’s like “heyyoo horsies!” and then the horses come walking over and he craps his pants and runs away.

After looking at these photos, I realized that I’ve officially entered the puffy face stage of pregnancy.  Or maybe it’s the corn dipped in butter and rolled in salt that did me in.  

img_2525Me and my 3 babies. Crosby, baby sister, and corn dipped in butter and rolled in salt.

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He’s “hugging” his pumpkins because he’s the cutest person on planet earth.

That’s it! Thanks for playing. And happy pumpkin-ing to you and your families!


happy second birthday, toddler guy.

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Happy second birthday, my beautiful baby guy.  I can’t even tell you how much I’ve loved year 2 of Crosby.  It’s been easily, hands-down, 100%, the best year of my life.  If I had one wish right now, it’d be to keep you at this age forever.  But today isn’t about my wishes, it’s about yours!  What are your birthday wishes, sweet boy?  If I had my guess, I’d say you’re wishing for… a “strawberry snack” (sliced strawberries), your “blanketandphi” (blanket + pacifier), a trip to the zoo, an episode (or 5) of Daniel Tiger, followed by a book reading marathon, a lengthy game of jumping up and down, and an ice cream cone.  I promise, I’ll do my best to grant as many of those wishes as possible today.

This year we’ve gotten to see so much more of your wonderful, sweet, silly personality.  I love that you call everyone your friends, I love that you say goodbye to everything: people, animals, objects, places…, I love your pure excitement when at the end of the night we talk about all the things we did that day, I love your ability to drop everything when you hear an airplane from a million miles away, I LOVE that you reach for my hand to hold, I love your sweet manners, I love your aggressive tickles… I just really freaking love you, kid.  And I absolutely adore being your mama.

I can’t wait to celebrate you today and smother you with one million kisses.  Happy second birthday, bubba!

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our european adventure. a month later.

So it’s been over a month since we took our trip to Paris and Amsterdam, but here I am finally getting around to sharing a few photos.  This post is more for me than for you (sorry) because I want to make sure that at least some of our photos are displayed somewhere.  Otherwise they’ll be shoved to the back of my photos folder, gathering virtual dust.  Please tell me I’m not the only delinquent who doesn’t make prints or do photo books?  I mean, I always SAY I’m going to.  But then I just go on living my life instead.

Anyhoosville, this is kind of an inconsistent smattering of pics because I constantly struggle with wanting to take a shitload of photos and also wanting to experience things without the distraction of a camera.

The early-2ooo’s digital camera tourist struggle is real, man.

Anyway, I’m just going to get right into it and add captions as necessary. #always

IMG_1335I had very few expectations of Paris going into this trip, but I cannot even tell you how much I enjoyed it.
It is effing beautiful.

IMG_1419We crammed in a few touristy things but mostly just wandered the city…


IMG_1416Taking in the sights…

IMG_5974And acting absurdly American.  (eg. Man: “Bonjour madame!”  Me: “Merci!”….  ::facepalm::)

IMG_5987We didn’t actually go into the Louvre, but we did admire it.  Though I do wish it wasn’t weirdly gift-wrapped like that…

IMG_5983My best gal, Carolyn.  And my other gal, coffee.


IMG_5989And my guy!

IMG_6021And this beaut!  She did not disappoint.

IMG_1437IMG_1442We stayed about 2 blocks from the Arc de Triomphe and this was the only photo we got of it!  Rookies.

IMG_1329This photo is more like a PSA for my fellow pregos, because this was the first N/A beer that didn’t make me want to chuck the bottle across the room.  So good!

IMG_6005Sacre Couer was beautiful, but SO overcrowded.  Both inside and outside.  What is it with tourists, am I right?!

IMG_6001IMG_1311The views of the Eiffel Tower neverrrrrrrrrrrrrrr got old.

IMG_1394 IMG_1375The reason for this whole trip! My GORGEOUS bestie, Kali and her dapper new husband. Their wedding was an absolute fairytale.

Except that I couldn’t drink wine at it.

IMG_1390Ok fine, I had HALF of a glass of champagne.  So sue me.

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IMG_1370The matching Zara skirt/dress situation was purely coincidental.

IMG_1384Beautiful couple, Michelin star chef, and 2 photo-bombing bozos.

IMG_1407IMG_1388My girls, minus one limb.  (We missed you Kendra!) 

IMG_1380IMG_1322Child-free, with my husband and best friends, in Paris.  You can’t put a price tag on this stuff, people.

Except, you can.  You can actually look at our hysterical credit card statement if you want to…



OFF to Amsterdam!

IMG_6038Where it rained every day except the day we were leaving!   Sometimes I like to imagine a rain cloud following me around saying “I wish I knew how to quit you.”

If you get that movie reference, give yourself a high-five.

1511-1We loved our hotel in Amsterdam! The rooms were adorable and the staff was so friendly.  I highly suggest it if any of y’all are headed there anytime soon.  In which case, can I come?

 IMG_6032Ok can we all just admit that Amsterdam is the MOST charming ever?  Seriously, I loved it.  We felt so at home there.  I highly highly encourage you to visit if you have the chance.  And if so, can I come?

IMG_6057Never pass up European caffeine, was my motto during the trip.  

IMG_6042Waiting in line for our tour of the Anne Frank house.  Which is UNREAL.  Must do, if you’re ever, you know, in the area.

IMG_6024I mean, C’MON!

IMG_6045Casey “why isn’t anyone wearing helmets this is so unsafe we are NOT renting bikes here you’re pregnant watch out!” Thompson


IMG_6027 IMG_1516There is something so fun to me about buying local munchies.  I could have spent numerous hours in the grocery store in Amsterdam. Is that weird?  Wait… is it?  IS IT?

Answer me!
IMG_1512OMG I don’t care because look how cute these Dutch Ella’s packets are!

Processed with VSCO with 6 presetMan. Don’t you just want to park your bike here forever?

Wait, is that morbid?

IMG_1486 IMG_1482You guys. The pastries in both Paris and Amsterdam. Ugh. I can’t even think about them without
having to wipe drool off my chin. 

IMG_1477Because I’m a good wife/person/etc. I accompanied Casey to a few pubs for some beer tastings.  And let me tell you, nothing is more fun than watching other people drink when you can’t.  ::side-eye::

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Processed with VSCO with f2 presetOh Amsterdam, you charming little love bucket!


And last but certainly not least… a collage of a few of my pastry endeavors. Ahhh… memories.pastriesyo1

Thanks for sticking around til the very end!  I hope you enjoyed my Europe trip as much as I did ;)


fam trip to chicago and indiana. in which we froze.

shawnnathompson_57_familyselfieJust a quickie post to drop off a few photos from our little family vacation to Chicago/Indiana last week.  Though I’m not quite sure you can call it a “vacation” when you have a 20-month old in tow.  It’s kind of like everyday life, but with a side of heightened anxiety, public restrooms, and jet lag.  It’s not exactly relaxing, is what I’m saying.  And don’t even get me started on flying with a toddler.  How can you really call it a “vacation” when you’re spending numerous hours suspended in a tin can in the air, touching body parts with total strangers, with a wiggly kid on your lap who is constantly rolling the tantrum dice.  I’m sprouting gray hairs just reliving it.

All that said, I absolutely LOVED our “vacation”.  No really, I did!  I never used to understand why parents would take their tiny children on trips.  I mean, they’re not going to remember it… right?!  But I totally get it now that I’m a ma, because it so so fun to explore the world and introduce new things to your little.  Even if Crosby won’t remember this trip, Casey and I will.  And we’ll remember how excited Crosby was at the Lincoln Park Zoo and how he shoved popcorn in his face at the Cubs game and danced his little butt off at our friend’s wedding.  Aaaaaand we’ll remember how he had a full-on meltdown in front of the gorilla exhibit because he ate the rest of MY Larabar and then was pissed that there wasn’t more.  (Crosby, not the gorilla. Though I’m sure the gorilla would have wanted my Larabar too.) But honestly, we had so much fun showing our little guy around one of our favorite cities.  And bringing him to his first wedding, where he impressed us with his killer dance moves that he no doubt learned from an episode of Daniel Tiger.

So here are the grainest, unedited iphone photos of our trip, if you care to see.  I took my nice camera along, but only brought it out once when we were at the zoo and maybe took 10 photos… and now I can’t find the cord to connect it to my computer.  So, I’m really sorry that you’re probably missing out on some high quality flamingo butts and blurry giraffe necks.  And by I’m sorry, I mean you’re welcome.

IMG_0695IMG_0719Guys. It was 44 degrees at this Cubs game.  And we were not prepared.  I had packed everything we might need for a rainstorm (#portlandproblems) but not nearly enough warm clothes for the tundra. I’m from the midwest, I should KNOW better!

IMG_0713 We only lasted 3 innings, and that’s mostly thanks to a box of popcorn that occupied Crosby’s facehole. His hands were freeeezing, but the kid just kept going.  He got his popcorn love from his mama, AKA the “Pepcorn Queen”.  (Just kidding nobody calls me that. But they should.  And maybe put it on a t-shirt? )

IMG_0711Processed with VSCO with f2 presetOMG. Look at the people behind us.  They were PREPARED, man.  Meanwhile, I had to buy a sweatshirt to put under my paper-thin raincoat.  And we had to buy a ridiculously expensive Cubs blanket for Crosby in order to save his appendages from freezing off.

IMG_0730IMG_0722 IMG_0748What does one do after sitting outside in the freezing cold for 2 hours?  They get ice cream, of course! Can’t pass up Jeni’s.

IMG_0735shawnnathompson_57_crosicecreamThe kid loves ice cream.  Also gets that from his mama.
I’m sensing a pattern.

IMG_0673We were actually super pumped about the 2 hour time change because in THEORY, Crosby should have slept until 8:30 Chicago time.  Which for us is like, all the dancing lady emojis.  But somehow, somehow, the little sheister managed to wake up at 6:30 every morning that we were there (AKA 4:30am Portland time).  I don’t get it.  It doesn’t make sense.  He’s so very lucky that he’s so very cute and sweet.

IMG_0683Sure, yah.  Take a nap.  You must be exhausted from all that getting up early and being pushed around and carried.

shawnnathompson_57_wakeupLook alive, sleep deprived!  Is our motto.  (No it’s not but it should be.  And maybe put it on a t-shirt?)

IMG_0784 IMG_0811 IMG_0807 IMG_0788IMG_0763 IMG_0770Loves of my lifetime.

 

IMG_0749Our airbnb had a walk-in shower, that Crosby walked into and turned on, on himself.  Lesson probably not learned.

IMG_0733^^Had to stop here, cuz duh.^^

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Where we ate this (lobster deviled eggs) and drank that (killer bloody mary).

IMG_0684And Cros almost slept through the whole thing.

IMG_0693Until he woke up and shoved his face with french fries for a photo opp.

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IMG_0839On Saturday we drove to South Bend, Indiana to go to our good friend’s wedding at Notre Dame. It was beautiful and lovely… and we’re so happy for you guys!
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Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll get back to eating my Garrett’s popcorn while Crosby takes a nap because I’m not sharing.

Happy weekend!


31.

IMG_8206This post is a week overdue but I still feel the need to put it to paper.  Errr…. to interwebs.  You know what they say, if you don’t blog about it, it didn’t actually happen.  True story.

Anyways, I turned 31 last weekend!  I don’t know why I’m !exclaiming! that because at this point it’s not something I feel the need to brag about.  Remember when Casey turned 31 and he had this whole theory about how you’re not really “in your 30’s” until you turn 31? And then I made fun of him?  Per usual.  And now… I totally understand where he’s coming from.  It’s all fun and games until you turn 31.  Is my new motto.  No it’s not.  I’m actually totally fine with it, but I do get what he’s saying now.

I had such a fun birthday weekend.  Well, birthday week, really.  If this birthday had a theme, I would say it was pampering.

Wait, is it just me or does the word “pampering” conjure up a completely different image after having a kid?  I mean, I’m assuming that’s how Pampers got their name, right?  I don’t like it.  Waa.  Excuse me while I go thesaurus an alternative word.

OK, I’m back.  Let’s try this again.  If this birthday had a theme, I would say it was mollycoddling.  (<— lol wut.)  Throughout the course of the week, I got a mani/pedi with one of my besties, I got my hair did, and my mom took me to get a facial and massage.   Plus, just having my mom here meant I barely had to cook, I barely had to change a diaper, I got treats and coffees and free time to do things like take a nap and take a toddler-free shower.  See!  I was mollycoddled!   Best part of all of it was the fact that my mom was here.  She’s the queen of making people feel special on their birthdays.  Decorations, cakes, gifts and cards, free babysitting.  She’s the very very best.

On my birthday night, Casey took me to dinner at a place where the servers use that little scraper thing that wipes up crumbs in between each course.  AKA fancy.  It was so freaking good, we’re convinced we cleaned our plates better than any other person that ate there that night.  We had a serious conversation about how they probably brought our plates back to the kitchen and were like, oh these are clean, did anyone even eat on them? we don’t even need to wash them.  Basically we were the King and Queen of the clean plate club, is what I’m trying to say.

And yes, that’s a whole paragraph on how much we ate at dinner.  It’s an exciting life we lead.

It was such a great birthday, and I’m so thankful to have such a wonderful family and friends to help me celebrate… me.  

birthdaybafoonsYou guys. What is wrong with us?  It took us approximately 37 tries to get a photo of just the two of us, without Crosby.  Here’s just a small smattering of the outtakes.  And why are our eyes shut in all of them?  Is this what happens when you’re officially in your 30’s?  Are your eyes more sensitive to light or something?  Help.

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Here’s to 31!  So far, so good.

Posts from my 28th, 29th and 30th birthdays herehere and here.


one and a half.

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It’s 8:15am and Crosby is already taking his first nap of the day.  Because 5am wakeup.  Whoever said that him getting up before 6am was a “phase” owes me a 10-month supply of Stumptown.  It doesn’t happen EVERY morning anymore, but it still happens more than humanly necessary.  The only positive from this (sleepy) situation is that I get so much accomplished before the rest of the world is still in their REM cycle.  So far this morning I’ve served my kid and I breakfast, done a load of laundry, read 4 books, danced around the dining room to children’s music, talked to my dad, engaged in a lengthy text convo with my pal, scheduled a dental appointment, solved world hunger and (drumroll please) gotten dressed!  ::fistpumps::

I likely won’t do anything else productive for the rest of the day though, so.

But speaking of little Crosboy, he is officially 1 1/2 years old today!  Non-parents reading this are like, WTF who cares.  And I’m all like, I knowwww but half birthday’s mean something when your kid is this little.  I don’t know why?  It’s just a rule or something.  Probably because every month is so significant, developmentally, when they’re this young?  Or maybe it’s because we’re all just so obsessed with our tiny little monkeys, we’ll take any excuse to talk about them/celebrate them/make ourselves feel bad about how quickly they’re growing.

So what does one do on their child’s 1 1/2th birthday?  Well, for starters I sang half of the happy birthday song to him before I laid him down for his nap.  I also gave him a one-armed hug.  I went in for a high-five but stopped halfway.  I only changed half of his diaper.  (I’ll just let you think about that for a moment….)

Am I doing this right?

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Realistically, I know that a half birthday isn’t cause for a huge celebration.  But that’s not going to stop me from giving Crosby 100 extra kisses and “i love you’s” today.   It’s also not going to stop me from taking 50 extra photos and saying “hello” to him a dozen more times in hopes that his sweet little voice will say “HEYYOW!” back to me.  It’s not going to stop me from looking the other way when he feeds the dogs his banana, because it makes him laugh so hard.  It’s not going to stop me from letting him take out and put on every single pair of shoes in my closet, even though he always trips in the heels AND it’ll take me forever to put them all away.  It’s not going to stop me from tickling/kissing all his chins as much as possible because I know he won’t let me do that shiz forever.  It’s also not going to stop me from writing this sappy blog post about my baby guy who is becoming more like a… boy guy… every single day.

And so anyways, the point of all this is to say happy half birthday, sweet baby guy.  I think you’ve earned yourself half of a cookie today.  shawnnathompson_halfbirthday3Maybe even two.

 


our holiday photos. AKA that day I wore makeup.

untitled-3143-EditA while ago we took some photos with our new friend Amy for our second annual holiday card.  I proclaimed my change in heart about holiday cards last year and I gotta say, my love for them has only grown since.  And once again, I blame Crosby. I think I speak for every parent in America when I’ll take any opportunity to say, LOOK AT HOW CUTE MY KID IS!  No but seriously, how cute is my kid?

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Right?

Here are my thoughts on taking photos with a toddler.  Don’t.  I’m JUST KIDDING!  Photoshoots with toddlers are a blast!!! ::side-eye::

Revelation time.  Before I had Crosby, I would look at other folk’s family photos in which everyone was smiling/looking at the camera and think, oh what a cute family.  And then I’d move on with my life.  Now that I have my own tiny little gremlin, I fully understand what a miracle it is to get a decent family photo.  It takes just the right combination of patience, flexibility, a sense of humor, a four-leaf clover, a genie in a bottle, a sprinkling of unicorn dust, and a jug of Carlo Rossi.  And a kick-ace photographer.  Luckily, my personal preference for family photos are more candid/lifestyle shots than super posed.  So I don’t feel too much pressure to get a perfect photo of all of us smiling at the camera while wearing matching denim shirts and making a human pyramid in front of waterfall.  Or something.  Though that does sound like fun…. Anyways!  Even though Crosby was quite squirrely when we took these photos, we still had a ton of fun bebopping around our neighborhood and cheesin’ it up.

Ok, here we go.  There are quite a few, so.  See ya.

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You did it!  We did it!

And thanks so much, Amy!

 

 


holiday recap. because it’s january, apparently.

IMG_3264Happy 2016 + 6 days!  How was everyone’s Christmas/New Years celebrations?  Full of good tidings and merriment and prosperity?  And the such?  Did you make resolutions?  Tell me, tell me!  I haven’t really made any official resolutions, though unofficially I’d like my favorite skinny jeans and I to be on speaking terms again.  ::she says as she lays in bed eating homemade dinner rolls while unsuccessfully attempting to tuck her second chin in::  I also say this all the time, but I’d really like to find time to blog more.  That said, hopefully your resolutions include finding time to read more nonsense stories written by yours truly.  Then it’s a win-win for everyone!

Stepping back a few weeks, our holiday break was really really lovely.  As cliché as it sounds, having a kid really does make everything so much more fun and magical around the holidays… even though our kid doesn’t know the difference between Christmas and his left foot yet, it’s still so exciting to start introducing him to all the festivities.  We spent the week before Christmas with our families in Minnesota.  Which was ss…s…sooo….mmm…mmmuch…ff.f.ff..ffun.  (<— that’s my attempt at typing shivers, did it work? or…) No seriously, it was great.  Cold, yes.  But also so much fun!  A vast improvement on last year’s MN Christmas when Crosby was in the dirty depths of his acid reflux/colic/not sleeping for longer than 45 mins at a time.  I have PTSD from last Christmas.  ::shudder::   In our typical MN-trip fashion, we crammed 165 million activities into the 9 days that we were there and it still somehow didn’t seem to be enough time to do all the things/see all the peeps/eat all the foods.  That last part is a lie… we actually did eat all the foods.  But you know what they say…. when in casseRome!  (Get it?  Casserole…. Rome…. casseRome….??….???…… nevermind.)  Anyways, thanks to our families and friends for making our trip “home” so wonderful!  Now if you’ll all kindly send me $50 to buy stretchy pants, that’d be great.

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Anyone else think that Crosby is channeling Dr. Evil in this photo?  Riiiiight.

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We got back to Portland a few days before official Christmas, which was actually kind of nice because we still had so much fun junk to look forward to.  Plus, this was going to be our first time celebrating Christmas on Christmas in our own home.  Don’t get me wrong, I love being with our larger families for the holidays but there was something so charming about being able to hang out at home on Christmas Eve and wake up and open presents with our kid under our own Christmas tree on Christmas morning.  I mean, that’s the American dream, isn’t it?  And we’re nothing if not patriotic.

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Whatevs, big guy.  Whatevs.

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We continued our little family’s tradition of opening a new pair of Christmas pj’s on Christmas Eve and watching a boatload of Christmas movies.  We also started a new tradition of making Christmas Eve lobster macaroni + cheese.  HOLLA!  (sorry.)  And broccoli, because growing toddler.  On Christmas morning, Crosby awoke us with enchanting angelic hymns jet-lagged screams at 4:45am.  I repeat, 4:45am!!!?!  Ho ho how?  Why?  Thank sweet little baby Jesus in the manger that Santa brought me a Nespresso for Christmas.  Because almond milk lattes are the true meaning of Christmas.  With a one-year-old.


IMG_5791 IMG_5792 IMG_5794 Crosby’s signature cheese face that I want to have tattooed on my hand.

IMG_5795 Cheese face hangover.  And guys?  Please note that it is still PITCH BLACK outside.  Because 5am.

IMG_5797 This was Crosby’s face when he caught his first glimpse of his new play kitchen!  That he never even knew he wanted!

IMG_5799 getting closer….

IMG_5801almost there…

IMG_5803Stoked.  Him, not me.  Ok, both of us.  And Gus.

IMG_5807 IMG_5808And what Christmas is complete without the Christmas Vacation moose mugs!?  “It’s good.  It’s good.”  PS I LIVED in these pajamas for approximately two weeks. They are so comfy, cozy.  Highly recommend.

Ok so!  Onto New Year’s Eve!  We planned a little shindig at our place with a few friends, buuut… we had to unexpectedly cancel it a few hours before everyone showed up because Crosby woke up from his nap that afternoon with a big ol fever.  Poor little dude.  And then poor me, who caught his bug a couple of days later.  Question: Parents of the world, is there any way to avoid getting whatever sickness your kid has?  If anyone has any pointers, please send them to me via UPS with a side of throat lozenges.  Thanks a mill.  We’re finally both on the mend after a doozy of a few days.  And I’m officially declaring us DONE with being sick for the rest of 2016.  Do you hear me, Carson Daly?!  NO MORE SICKNESSES FOR THE THOMPSONS.  It’s hard enough we have to deal with your bullshit on the Voice night after night.  (am I right or am I right?)

Welp, that about does it for us at Camp Kleenex.  I hope you’re all having a magical and snot-free start to your 2016.

And hey, thanks for reading.

 


thursday things. on a friday.

1. The other day I made the flattest banana bread of my life.  I usually excel at banana bread.  (This recipe tastes like unicorn tears)  But this time, it only lived up to half of its potential.  Likely because halfway through making it, I realized that Casey had used the last of the eggs for his scrambled eggs that morning.  (But you’re a stay-at-home mom, don’t you make your husband’s breakfast everyday?  Hahahaha, no.)  And anyways, no eggs meant that my little banana bread came out all flat and sad-looking. I felt so bad for her.  I kept imagining how self-conscious my little banana bread might feel next a bigger, more well-endowed banana bread.  So I tried to make her feel better by telling her it’s what’s on the inside that counts.

2. I promise I have a life.

3. But speaking of well-endowment (??), does anyone remember that book where the boys give the girl’s state nicknames based on their boob size?  Like, the girl who gets Colorado has big tator tots and the girl who gets Nebraska is as flat as…. my banana bread.  It’s got to be a Judy Blume book, right?  Help!  This is going to bug me.

4. In regards to #3, I imagine that I used to be an Oregon, all mountainous.  But since having a kid, I’m more like a Pennsylvania… sloping hills and what not.

5. If I have any male readers left after #4, I applaud your stamina.  Let me take you out for a nice whiskey drink.

6. We got Crosby a play kitchen for Christmas (shh don’t tell him) and I’m fancying it up with spray paint and contact paper, because I’m a douchebag mom.  But anyways, yesterday I put on like a million coats of spray paint and now… my arm is sore.  I probably shouldn’t be telling you that.

7. Last week I took a freelance job so we had to send Crosby to daycare for a few days, which was only the second time in his itty bitty life that he’s gone.  And wouldn’t you know?  He got sick.  Then I got sick.  Then Casey got sick.  Then my dad (who was here visiting) got sick.  Then my stopmom got sick.  With a stomach virus.  It was a calamity of events that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.  Except maybe Donald Trump.  Now he’s a real douchebag.

8. In addition to us all getting sick last weekend, our dog Gus got into my stepsister’s luggage and ate a bunch of her vitamins/pills… including Advil.  And if you don’t know, Advil is no bueno for doggies.  It can cause kidney failure, among many other scary sounding things.  So in the midst of my stomach bug, I had the distinct honor of bringing my dog to the vet to get his stomach pumped.  He ended up having to spend the night at the hospital for monitoring and fluids and such… and long story short, he’s going to be just fine.  We’re going to have to take out a second mortgage to pay for his vet bill, but hey, Crosby doesn’t need to go to college, right?

9. On a more exciting note!  We’re heading to Minnesota today for Christmas!  Uffdah you betcha doncha know!  (<—sorry)  I talked to my sweet grandma on the phone yesterday and she offered to make us a casserole when we go to her house for lunch next week.  I literally cannot wait.

10. By a show of hands, who thinks clogs are an acceptable footwear choice.  Because I currently have 2 pairs on my Christmas list.  #portlandproblems